#5 Lynn

I'm writing a sex blog, but I have to admit that I am quite repulsed at the state of sexuality in the 21st century. With easy access to pornography on the internet and cell phones, it seems like pornography is everywhere, and contains no boundaries. More and more people are trying to have sex like pornstars, rather than simply finding the right elements that make the act of having sex so unique and enjoyable. This might seem ironic as I write candidly about my fantasies and experiences, focusing on the imagery and graphic nature of the act rather than in the overall emotional experience. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love sex, I watch porn and get turned on by it, but I also feel a sense of disgust at how messed up sex can become and how one-dimensional sex is portrayed out there in the world today.

Ok enough preaching, here's a different episode in my life.

#5 Lynn

I love categorizing things, ranking things. It comes from my love for logic, calculus and sports. I believe it not to always be a true reflection of one's true ability (someone with an IQ of 135 isn't necessarily smarter than someone with an IQ of 115 for instance), but it makes me feel more organized, and more in control of my life and persona. The reason I'm saying this, is because the sex I had with Lynn ranks as the worst sex that I've had.


Lynn was a 40yr old co-worker, 12 years my senior. She was a rather attractive woman, but not really my type. Short blond hair, cold blue eyes, big teeth, tiny breasts with huge nipples, and a strong athletic body. Very nice ass I might add. Irritating laugh and facial expressions during the act that had me looking away. Lynn was in a bad marriage for
12 years with a man who didn't know how to satisfy her sexually, and who didn't care for sex at all... thinking that sex was a dirty act. As a result, Lynn was very thirsty for new and exciting experiences. I would be only her 2nd or 3rd partner since her breakup. I'll spare you the details of how we got to sleep with each other, only to say that during our first night together I struggled greatly as:

1) her pussy was waaaaay too loose for my modestly thick penis
2) she was way too aggressive in her movements, squeezing my arms and legs with her limbs with the force of Lucy Lawless, causing major neck pain and skin burns.

Lynn was aggressive in everything she did. I remember being shocked by how fiercely she chopped onions and scrubbed her dishes.

The sex lacked any sensuality, and was clearly painful than enjoyable. I dealt with this by outdueling her wresting moves, pushing her away from me, grabbing her thighs and taking control. Unable to come facing her, I turned her body around and proceeded to fuck her from behind. Her ass was definitely a better feature than her breasts and face. I don't mean to be a dick about it, but it's the sad truth. Her back was pretty nice as well, quite muscular as you can imagine.

Doggystyle was slightly better, but I could still feel only little sensation while penetrating her. None of that nice pussy squeezing feeling around my shaft. It almost felt as though I was fucking an empty tennis ball tube.

We had sex about 4-5 times over a period of two weeks. Finally, the excitement of sleeping with a co-worker, and the relief of getting back into action after 4 years of exclusivity to Maria wared off. I put an end to the relationship. Lynn didn't take to it well, and even suggested we become fuck buddies. At that time I was growing uncomfortable at work as I could feel some people noticing signs that Lynn and I were screwing around (thanks to her increasing visits to my office, and unsubtle blinks of the eye). I refused her offer and tried my best to be civil to her and not act as an ass hole who had simply used her for a lay or two. None of that find 'em, fuck 'em, forget 'em crap.

a couple weeks later, on a Friday night, I got drunk, and as I was headed home (by foot of course) Lynn called to say "I'm in your area and thought I'd say hi" to which I replied "oh hi! well I'll be home in 5 minutes. Why don't you come by?". This would be our last fuck but also the best I had with her. It was the best because I wasn't thinking, I was just following my instincts which consisted in grabbing her at the entrance of my flat, taking all her clothes off, carrying her against my wall mirror, and feeling her with my hands and mouth right there in the dark. I then proceeded to carry her to my room, throw her on the bed, and reach for a comdom. At which point she turned around and got on her knees in doggystyle position. I fucked her intensely that way for a few minutes, after which she whispered in my ear "fuck me in the ass". I happily did, as you well know by now that my cock and her pussy don't mix and match too well. The anal sex we had after that felt much better, and triggered some loud moans and grunts from her part. I came in less than 30 minutes, which was a first with her.

She left my flat at 5am to change home before picking up her kids at their granparents' house. I was very happy to wake up alone, and satisfied that our last fuck turned out to be our best.

What followed wasn't very glorious. She began stalking me at work, following me in the parking lot, and calling me in the middle of the night begging me to give her another chance. Eventually I had to urge her to stop contacting me in any shape or form. A month later I had what would be my 4th breakdown due to depression, which later triggered the end of my work. A place I loved, but a job I didn't particularly enjoy. Lynn tried to contact me again, but I put an end to it by sending her a mean -but just- e-mail, in which I underlined that her actions were making me uneasy and were a threat to my well being. Thankfully, she respected my request and I haven't heard from her since.

A few posts ago, I wrote about the "follow me and i will avoid you / avoid me and i will follow you" syndrome. Most of the time I'm in the follower's position (though never in the psycho harassing Lynn way) but in this case, I was definitely turned out to be the avoider.